Wait, now. I don’t mean like that absurdly negative person in your life who says: “I expect nothing. That way I’m never disappointed.” Oh, if only that were true. What they really mean is: “I’m expecting to be disappointed. I’m always disappointed, so why should the holidays be any different?” That’s obviously NOT what we’re going for. “Expect nothing” in a positive, non-victim way simply means staying neutral.
Holidays have a way of luring out the control freak in all of us. Between the constant bombardment that sneakily begins post-Labor Day in stores, on commercials, and the Hallmark channel’s 1700 days of Christmas… the family—the cooking—the shopping— the cramming in our work so we can be done before “the holidays”… there’s a lot of pressure for everything to be perfect. How can our actual holiday experience ever hope to live up to all that?
So, what if we just made a conscious decision now to have zero expectations? I’m serious. Zippo expectations about who’s going to come; how they’re going to act; what the food will turn out like; how great the decorations should be; what presents we will or won’t get; how travel will go; what we’ll find or not find shopping… I mean, are our expectations beloved traditions… or just annual bad habits? Too often, we unconsciously, at this time of year, dive headfirst into this panicky pressure cooker. In September, someone mentions “holidays” and our blood pressure starts going up and doesn’t come down until mid-January. This year, let’s intervene. Here’s how:
Stay Present— (“OMG if one more person says that!!”) Okay, yes, it’s trendy, overused, and sounds dumbish but: Present Moment Living is simply gently shifting our focus from what’s in our heads to what’s right in front of us right now. Consider this: What are holiday expectations but just crappola we’ve conjured up in our heads? “What if the food / decorations / house / kids are horrible? Everything needs to be perfect!” “What if I run out of time to buy gifts and wrap everything?” “What if those people get drunk and ruin everything…again?”
What if we decide right now, no matter how crazy all of the hoopla gets, to consciously keep taking moments to shift our focus from what’s in our heads to what’s right in front of us right now… and just let it all unfold on its own? What if we don’t give in to our annual control freak that tries to manipulate every corner of the holidays? Won’t the whole holiday experience be so much more enjoyable if we simply expect nothing?
